FML: Phone Interview Edition

I did mad interview prep for a phone interview last week. I read the careers section of the company’s website. I read the relevant portions of the most recent annual report. I caught up on macro-level industry developments. I had a 30 minute call with a classmate at the company. I typed up several pages of notes explicitly detailing why I was interested in working for that company in that particular role. Did I do this because it was fun? No, I did it because mama needs a job.

Things I would rather do include:
1) Read only the war sections of War and Peace
2) Joy ride public transportation
3) Build revenue management models

But I took one for the team, the team of course being me.

Finally 2:00PM rolled around. Showtime muppets! I wait for the hiring manager to call me as scheduled.

2:07PM – Still waiting. Maybe he’s on another call that ran late?

2:15PM – Still silence on my end. See, this is why I prefer to do the calling.

2:22PM – Good Lord, this is worse than waiting for a guy to call. The same truism appears to hold: my watched phone does not ring. Glad to see that my time is appreciated and valued.

2:23PM – Ok, time to take matters into my own hands. I call the recruiter to check in. She apologizes and tracks down the hiring manager to see what happened. She calls me back a few minutes later to let me know that the hiring manager will be calling me in a couple of minutes.

2:25PM – The phone rings at last! I pick up and the hiring manager informs me that he was in a meeting that ran late and oh yeah, he has a call at 2:30PM. So our call is going to be briefer than a pair of Calvin Kleins.

2:27PM – This interview is already an unmitigated disaster. The hiring manager is not digging my background and he is wondering aloud why I don’t already have a job. Dude, you and me both buddy.

2:31PM – I ask what I think is an insightful question regarding the increasingly important role of partnerships within the industry. The hiring manager is not impressed. In fact, I think I actually hear him smack his forehead. His enlightening response? “Yeah we have some partnerships.” Thanks for the clarification.

2:33PM – The hiring manager announces that he has to run and hangs up.

FML. I can’t believe I just did 3 hours worth of interview prep for a 10 minute call.

Key takeaway: Some hiring managers are just douchebags.